Friday, November 5, 2010

Games/Books that SHOULD be movies! #4

Here it is...the game you have all been waiting for ( or were pretty damn expecting anyway)....Today we will talk why this game should be a movie...Introduing!! *snaps his fingers*
*lights get dim, red curtain is lighted. The sound of the ochestra begins*
tam...tararatatatatam.. taratatatatatatatatatatata TAAM taratatatatat ratatatatarararartatatatata...
*curtain opens wide to expose a golden throne with a series of golden cd's one for each game*
*cheers and applauds from the frantic audience soundclips i have recorded and played at this very moment*
YES! it is my favorite series of games for those new enough in the audience....what Charlie? Yes i know you are the janitor....Yes i know there is noone here!...oh yeah? well.......YOU ARE FIRED!!

Now...lets go with a basic summary as taken from ze internets:

Up until Heroes of Might and Magic V, the Heroes series took place in the same fictional universe as the Might and Magic series, and later Might and Magicinstallments heavily referenced the games, with some taking place in the same world.

Heroes I and II take place on the planet of Enroth, on a northerly continent of the same name, and chronicle the adventures of the Ironfist dynasty. The protagonist of Heroes I is Lord Morglin Ironfist, a knight who discovers a portal to the realm of Enroth while fleeing from his throne's usurpers, and goes on to conquer and dominate the continent, establishing a unified kingdom and a new rule.

Heroes II featured a two-sided conflict between Morglin's sons, Roland and Archibald, both vying for their deceased father's throne. Canonically, Roland defeats Archibald, though the player can choose to align themself with either side. It was the first game in the series to feature playable heroes as campaign characters – the main characters of Heroes I were represented by the player's presence rather than as commanders on the battlefield.

The storylines of Heroes III and the Heroes Chronicles shift focus to the Gryphonheart dynasty on the southern continent of Antagarich, and introduces theKreegan as playable characters and enemies. In Heroes III, Queen Catherine Gryphonheart, King Roland's wife, is called home to attend her father's funeral, to discover Antagarich being torn apart by various factions. Heroes III's expansions build on the setting with more prominent character development, featuring new and old heroes from the series in differing roles.

The events preceding Heroes IV precipitated the destruction of Enroth due to a clash between Armageddon's Blade and the Sword of Frost. The ensuing destruction brings about portals leading to another world, Axeoth, through which many characters escape. Heroes IV's campaigns focus on the scattered survivors from Enroth and Antagarich as they form new kingdoms and alliances in the new world.


Heroes of Might and Magic V was the first Might and Magic title to take place on the previously unheard-of world of Ashan, as part of Ubisoft's franchise-wide continuity reboot. Its six campaigns are each centered around a faction leader, tied together by the character of Isabel Greyhound, Queen of the Griffin Empire. The Heroes V expansion packs both continued this storyline, leading into the events of Dark Messiah of Might and Magic. Heroes VI is to act as a prequel, occurring 400 years prior.

Reason for why they should be movies:
Well the series though begins pretty boring, cliche story, (At least from number 2 which i began playing) brother vs brother, the evil brother wants to usurp the throne blah blah blah. Boring and cliche you say? Well just wait because here comes the crown jewel of the series. Heroes Of Might And Magic 3 and the expansions. Even if you chose one perspective, lets say, since it sells much, we take the story from the side of the humans. We have a demon invasion comming from Underground. But that is where the Warlocks reside! YES they have allied with the demons. Screwed you say? wait it gets better, from the south, the necromancers think "hey everyone is killing each other, we raise dead, lets go play with the living" and they begin assaulting as well. Yes for you girls out there, there ARE elves in this one, and they DO help the poor poor Queen. But from the north, 2 nations kill each other (practically people like to kill each other lots in those games) and off course the battle is raged in the borders of the human empire. Now you say all this seems kinda chaotic, well yes it is. But the game is called heroes. So there are plenty of stories to chose from. Either by describing the story of the Elven Legend Gelu, the Queen Cathering of the humans, the Demon lords, Sandro the Necromancer, Kilgor the Barbarian, a wizard dude which i dont remember, or the Tatalian lizardmen you have plenty of senarios ripe for amazing movies. Dont like the idea of that? want a more epic theme like Lord of the Rings? well then do the destruction of the universe at the end of heroes 3 and the begining of heroes 4. The point is? Endless possibilities, breathtaking world, magic that makes lord Voldemort from harry potter seem like a conjurer of cheap tricks taking rabbits out of hats, and romance and battles to satisfy the most grumpy of the part.


Honestly there are so many people that could play in this movie that i really dont have enough space to write all the actors. Hell not even one episode of the Heroes series can fit here, you want me to cast the whole thing? Pm me people you know from the series and would like my opinion of them and i will do my best

P.S if you dig those games too much you will find an interesting series with what me and my friend George call the crossover of Chuck Norris and Barbie of the Heroes Universe. Introducing TARNUM! The dude is practically everywhere, and is anything. You can see him as: Tarnum the barbarian, Tarnum the wizard, Tarnum the beastmaster, Tarnum the knight, Tarnum the priest, Tarnum the elvisprisley king, Tarnum the Elven Ranger, Tarnum goes to Hollywood, Tarnum and the seven Goblins, Sleeping Tarnum, Little red bloody Tarnum, The 3 orcs and the big bad Tarnum, Die Hard 5: the Tarnum Chronicles, Tarnum the overlord, Tarnum the Demon Lord, Jesus Christ: The life of Tarnum, The Nightmare Before Tarnum, THe headless Tarnum AND MUCH MUCH MORE! (well not all are true but you get the picture)



  1. And i didnt even went on to say about heroes 4 and 5 as well as the rpg's lmao

  2. The Nightmare Before Tarnum? Now that I'd like to see :P

  3. i think that the "Tarnum" Series of anything would be hillarious just to think of it :P


There is lot of spam lately at the posts, so for a while i will put up the comment moderation. Sorry for that, i really don't like it but i thought it might stop the spamming. It will be down soon enough! Thanks a lot :)

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